Counting the Cost.
When is the last time you were in a situation that made you feel scared, uncomfortable, frustrated, inconvenienced, uncertain, etc.?
If you are like me, it was about 10 minutes. Maybe for you, though, it was this morning, yesterday, or even a week ago. Honestly, though, each and every day is filled with so many circumstances and/or decisions that are not the most ideal or preferred.
This new year has brought various trials and hardships, although nothing too overbearing or completely out of the norm for me, but definitely things I would not have chosen for myself. I have had to make multiple sacrifices. I have had to make many transitions. I have had to make many decisions without all the answers. I have had to continue to learn to rest in God's grace and plans rather than my own. I have had to continue to learn how to walk by faith and not by sight. We are all on a lifelong journey of learning to trust God and His Word.
Through it all, one thing the Lord continues to bring me back to is the cost of saying yes and following Him. In the Bible, Jesus makes it very clear to "count the costs" before we say yes to follow Him.
Luke 14: 25-33 says,
"Now great crowds accompanied him, and he turned and said to them, “If anyone comes to me and does not hate his own father and mother and wife and children and brothers and sisters, yes, and even his own life, he cannot be my disciple. Whoever does not bear his own cross and come after me cannot be my disciple. For which of you, desiring to build a tower, does not first sit down and count the cost, whether he has enough to complete it? Otherwise, when he has laid a foundation and is not able to finish, all who see it begin to mock him, saying, ‘This man began to build and was not able to finish.’ Or what king, going out to encounter another king in war, will not sit down first and deliberate whether he is able with ten thousand to meet him who comes against him with twenty thousand? And if not, while the other is yet a great way off, he sends a delegation and asks for terms of peace. So therefore, any one of you who does not renounce all that he has cannot be my disciple."
Some who read this can feel offended or confused because why would Jesus tell us to hate our family or our own lives? Jesus is just telling us in this passage that we must weigh the costs and make the choice that following Him is worth the cost of leaving behind our own families, friends, jobs, securities, comforts, and ultimately our own plans and lives.
In John 16:33, Jesus tells us, "I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have trials. But take heart; I have overcome the world."
The day that we choose to follow Jesus and decide to be His disciple, is the day we make the choice to give up control of our lives and all the comforts we prefer. It's the day we let go of knowing all the details before we act. It's the day we give up the plans we make up for our own lives and trust that His ways are higher than our ways and His thoughts greater than our thoughts (Isaiah 55:8-9).
Although this can be truly be difficult and learning to walk by faith is a growth process until the day we arrive Home, it is the most life giving opportunity that Jesus invites us into. Do not hear me incorrectly, walking by faith and being a disciple of Christ is the hardest and most challenging thing one could do; however, it is the best and the most rewarding life one could ever ask for.
Frankly, over the years, I have had to sacrifice A LOT for the sake of obeying the Lord and trusting His plans. It has hurt. It has sucked. It has been pretty awful and brutal at times, especially when my anxiety is so unbearable that I cannot eat or sleep and I cannot breathe without pain in my chest. I know that your story is not going to be the same as my story. But I can say, we all face hardships, trials, and decisions where we are uncertain of how we will make to through and overcome. It is in these moments that walking by faith and not by sight becomes the biggest blessing and our greatest hope.
God promises that He is with us through it all. God tells us that He is completely sovereign and all knowing. God tells us that He is faithful and good. God tells us that He has adopted us as His children through the blood of Jesus if we just believe and choose to follow Him. God tells us that He is for us and not against us. God tells us that He loves us and has good and perfect plans for us, plans that gives us hope and a future. The list of God's promises is ultimately endless. And it's His promises we absolutely MUST cling to in the midst of it all. Good days AND bad days. Easy seasons AND hard seasons. In the calm AND in the chaos of the storm.
Friends, through it all, even when we are faithless, He is faithful (2 Timothy 2:13). The cost of being a disciple is great, but the cost is worth it. Christ paid the ultimate cost by dying on the cross on behalf of me and you and this broken, fallen world. If He counted me worthy enough to die for, why on earth would I not count Him worthy enough to live for? Yes, it is hard, but I tell you the truth and I would scream it from the mountaintops every moment of the day if I could... it is the BEST life one could ever live. It is a life filled with hope, joy, and strength no matter the circumstances because He is our source of life.
I am not sure where you are today or what is going on in your life. I am not sure what you are struggling to trust God for today or what you are patiently waiting for Him to do. I hope and pray that you know you are deeply loved, known, and seen by the King of Kings and Lord of Lords. I also hope and pray that you are able to take some time to reflect and count the cost of being His disciple, and while you sit with Him, may you simply look at Him and see the incredible opportunity He has made available to us: an abundant life through a personal relationship with Him. And may you truly decide that HE is worth the cost and would it give you a peace, hope, and joy that surpasses all understanding.
As I have had to say many of times over the past 5 months, "Yes, this is hard. Harder than I would like. BUT JESUS IS BETTER. Obedience is greater than sacrifice."
But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you." - Matthew 6:33
Soli Deo gloria.