The Nearness of God.
"Dear Jenn, I know you might be older than me and I want to say that you might be a lot or a little scared, but God is with you. Love, Avery"
Little did I know how God was going to use this letter from an 8 year old to teach me, challenge me, and grow me this year. As I wrestled with figuring out what I was afraid of and recognizing some areas I was not believing God's presence with me, it was within 24 hours of receiving that little note that I began to see those answers clearly.
As we come to the end of another year, the reflections are many and the gratitude is real. On one hand, I am far from where I thought I'd be and was far off from achieving the realities that I had hoped would be true by this time; however, on the other hand, I have grown in areas and achieved some impactful wins in my life that have far exceeded any of my anticipations or plans.
While reading through my journal entries, it was amazing to see a consistent theme of the attributes of God that He has been showing me and teaching me this year: His closeness and His presentness.
In far more ways than words can express, I have clung tightly to these characteristics of His while navigating some of my greatest fears and deepest desires this year. These attributes gave me a hope amidst certain despairs and heartache, along with a joy and peace despite fear and anxiety. I am so grateful that we have a God who truly loves us and always walks alongside us, even when we feel alone or in turmoil.
Because of the lessons that accompanied me in learning God's closeness and presentness, I can honestly say that I am ending this year in a way I haven't done so in years, and for that I am incredibly grateful.
This year I am ending with a joy that is not attributed to any circumstance or person. In all honesty, I am actually ending this year in some disarray along with unfixed and less than ideal circumstances; however, there is a deep rooted joy that is truly unexplainable outside of Christ and His gospel of Truth.
A prayer written multiple times in my journals this year that I want to share with you is: I’m restless until I’m resting in You, O Lord.
Loved ones, I pray that this prayer would be one that you, too, find some comfort and hope. I pray that no matter what you are walking out of this year or how you are walking into this new year, you would know that the only place any of us can truly find rest is by resting in the Lord's character and Truth. Our restlessness is often tied to our lack of resting in God and His character. And our discontentment is often tied to our expectations not being met.
Even if you didn't meet your goals and achieve particular/ideal rhythms this year, all is well.
Even if you followed through on all of your 2023 resolutions, your identity is not in those successes.
Even if this year did not go according to your hopes and plans, God is still sovereign and completely in control.
Even if you are ending this year in a place of heartache and despair, cling tightly to the Truth that God is with you and is present in it with you.
And even if this year went differently than expected, yet you find yourself in a good place, praise God for His grace that guided you through another year.
The Lord is truly the Provider of all. He provides us with the grace to keep going, the grace to believe and hope, and the grace to have plenty - in seasons of little and abundance.
There is so, so much to be grateful for, even with the reality that many of our hearts are simultaneously carrying grief caused by the effects of sin.
As you end this year, be sure to take some time to sit and reflect. Ask some of the following questions as you wrap up one year and start another:
Where did I see God answer a prayer this year?
How was God faithful in being exactly what I needed Him to be in a particular moment/situation?
What did God teach me about His character?
Where did I see God's faithfulness, love, care, grace, and/or provision this year?
What are some areas of my relationship with God that I want to grow in?
What is one thing I want to commit to praying for this coming year?
What is one attribute/characteristic of God that I want to learn more about this coming year?
So Happy New Year, fam! May God be glorified in and through you this next year. And no matter what, please do not lose heart. God is with you. Cling to Him. Sit with Him. Cling to His truth. Be still before Him. Let Him continue to teach you how to truly love Him with all of your heart, mind, soul, and strength and how to trust and obey, no matter the circumstance.
Soli Deo gloria.